Golden Rules of Wise Living

What really matters in the end said, Gautama Buddha, is,
"How well did you love,
How fully did you live and
How deeply did you let go?"

All three are golden rules of wise living. Here, 'let go' means renouncing with full clarity and determination those aspects of life which are detterent to a full, wholesome life. Life goes on inexorable and before we can comprehend and appreciate its functioning and profundity, it is time for our exit. In our ignorance and our ego, we spend an entire lifetime trapped in negativities and self-defeating behavioral patterns. Broadly, we remain ensnared in endless desires, undue attachments, colored visions about others and the past and future.

"Letting Go" is a slow and arduous process that cannot be achieved overnight. As one traverses life and advances in age, experience and wisdom, the anomalies of one's life become lucid. Once identified, its easier to make a conscious effort to surmount them. Desire for wealth, power and fame never seems to satiated, leading to discontent, frustration and inner turmoil. The beauty of life remains untapped and life just passes by in a mindless pursuit of desires. A state of no- desires is verily an impossibility and tantamount to godhood. But we certainly work with full understanding on minimizing our desires and gradually relinquishing them.
We have a compelling propensity of dwelling in the past and brooding about the unseen future, thereby neglecting the present. Revelling in past glories or wallowing in self pity due to past tribulations is futile.
Past is a graveyard and the future, inscrutable. We need to abnegate them fully, only then we can seize the golden opportunities of the present and move on in life.

Largely our behaviors and beliefs are the result of mental conditioning. Our mind gets conditioned by our previous experiences with people and events and accordingly forges opinions which with time, ossify into convictions. An entire life can squandered in hatred and hostility towards individuals who do not deserve it. We are changing and evolving, flexibility in our beliefs and opinions are life- enhancing. We need to sincerely let go our prejudices, grouses, biases, anger, jealousies via reconditioning of our mind. This will be conducive to a healthy, equanimous life.
Our undue attachment to animate and inanimate objects can be painful not only for ourselves but for others as well. Who is not familiar with ephemeral nature of these objects? undoubtedly, wealth in certain measure is required for comfortable living. We do not have to abandon wealth. What we need to give us is greed and possessiveness for material objects. We need to relate to them with mental resignation. They should be means for life, not life itself. Paradoxically, wealth can be prerequisite for spiritual enrichment. It is only after our material needs have been taken care of and we are still unfulfilled that we choose to turn inwards.
Similarly, we should let go of our attachments to near and dear ones. Attachment is essentially selfish love. Attached parents may not permit their children to settle abroad, despite their growth prospects, because they need them in old age. Replace attachment with love which is pure and altruistic. Rabindranath Tagore said - "Love does not claim possession but gives freedom"

The moment you get too attached to things, people, money, your job you invariably screw it up! The challenge of life is to appreciate everything and attach yourself to nothing. When you chase things too hard they run away. Did you ever need to sell something, desperately? A car, a house, who wanted it? Nobody! So you dropped the price. Who cared? Nobody! The principle? When you are desperate, zilch!

Talk to any sales person whether they are in Lear Jets or laundry detergents, and they will tell the same story. Desperation pulls you into a descending spiral – and the more your worry, the less people buy! What happens when you are in a restaurant and in a hurry for your meal! They lose your order. Detachment is major reason rich people get richer. They do not care so much, they are not desperate.

On the mental and physical level, we are dealing with natural laws. Nature does not understand desperation! Nature seeks balance and you cannot be desperate and balanced. Life does not have to be an endless struggle. Let things flow. It is not indifference, it is neither forcing things